Sinking Depression

It began subtly, sleep prolonged

An innocent attempt to balance the deficit

That persisted despite the lack of tiredness

Dreaming to escape.

For a time, I ignored the heavy pull

Of thoughts, long stifled, to stop trying

But they flooded my mind, circling hope

Like vultures to prey

Consistent, persistent, calculating.

It was the blandness of food

The invisible weighted blanket

Of hopelessness, emptiness

That I carried around unwillingly

Growing heavier day-by-day.

It was the building evidence

Of failure, despite the opposite proof,

Tears channeled from seeing happiness

Without the ability to partake,

Flowing down cheeks like a geyser, erupted

Then the aftermath of anhedonia

When staring at walls, feeling nothing at all

Seemed as normal as breathing.

Depression is sinking on dry land

A hollowed-out version of existence

And those who survive

Will never truly believe their resilience

Until joy begins to thaw them out.

Published by Quietest Poet

Writer, mother, counselor, flower gardener, recipe seeker, and Netflix lover.

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